Expectations - Post Deployment Reunion Considerations

Today, as a part of the redeployment process, I had to attend a briefing that addressed many of the "going home considerations". The military has put some thought into the reintegration process to assist service-members with their adjustment to the world after completing year-long deployments.

I used to just sit through the boredom, checking the block because there literally was a block to check on a checklist. It was one of my tickets home. But this time I actually listened. There was some new relevance for me.

I have a reunion with HusBand to consider and while I am excited, I am admittedly nervous about this. Not that I think it will be bad, but I'm nervous about the unknown. In this brief, the chaplain urged us to take those valuable lessons learned over this past year, and apply them. Our year apart from loved ones has changed us, and maybe for the better.

For example, maybe I have become more patient as a result of 14 hours a day rotting my brain at work. That would be a good character trait to allow into my relationships.

The chaplain also advised us of possible bad habits that we may have picked up and that an attitude adjustment may be necessary for a successful reintegration with our family. Our families should not be treated like a fellow or subordinate soldier.

Our spouses may have changed in ways that we may not recognize such as becoming more independent or wary of you stepping back in the picture taking charge again.

For me, I hope that HusBand and I will enjoy the same things we used to. Our kitties - hopefully they will settle into life with us again.

Sugarkitty

Lara

Nick

We will travel to fun places.

San Francisco 

Vegas!

New Orleans

Montazah in Alexandria, Egypt

Eat good food.

HusBand's wonderful homemade popovers!

There were so many fun and wonderful things about our life that I miss. They seemed mutually shared and simple. Kitties, travel, and food!  Fitness is another shared hobby that I believe will remain a part of our lives. It was before we deployed, was an individual priority this past year (and has preserved sanity), and I honestly think we can continue this good habit/hobby of ours.

As much as I want all of these things to magically go back to the way they were, "don't expect everything to happen right away," the chaplain warned us. It's ok for things to be awkward. It's also ok to not accept change right away. We have some time for things to gradually settle into a new normal.

There is also time to take advantage of support offered by the military such as individual or marital counseling. The chaplain urged us to consider those known problems or issues that are most likely to prevent a happy homecoming and address them while you have the resources and time to do so. Especially in the first 90 days before that new normal becomes a old torment.

But I know that many of us in that room were thinking something along the lines of - time is so precious. I don't want to waste it "adjusting" and "reintegrating".  But this is the attitude adjustment he spoke of earlier.  You can't control, force, or rush this process. It's all theory for me right now, dear readers. I'll get to live this very soon!